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The America’s Got Talent final show is over and we want to congratulate Darci on her win. We all knew she would wrap things up but the pressure of being the front runner was enormous for her. I’m glad it wasn’t something Evelyn had to carry right now. Thank you to all of you who voted and supported Evie Clair. There is some ambiguity for the lower 5 so we don’t know if she was 6th place or 10th but I believe the opportunities going forward will be similar regardless.

Producers decided to have the star, James Arthur, sing a song with Evie for the finale that she and Kirra and Porter wrote together called “Okay Day.” This is really special for many reasons;

First: celebrities will usually agree to go on shows like this to promote themselves and sing their own songs. James Arthur’s willingness to sing her song and the kind way he did it and his genuine concern for her over the loss of her father were astounding.

Second: a few months ago Evelyn had a very vivid dream where she was in a circle of fire and the rain came down around her and put the fire out. The words to the bridge came to her in that dream;

“When the clouds start to form and the rain starts to fall; everyone knows after rain comes a rainbow after all.”

I’m sure she never imagined that the person who sings the current hit “Say You Won’t Let Go” would be singing it with her for the finale of the biggest show in the world! Nevermind that they only had 20 Minutes to pull it together!

The best parts of the day were the moments we both were star struck. Evie was set to rehearse with James and I had to push her through the practice room door. She was so nervous to meet him in person. She covered her red face and she couldn’t control the water coming from her eyes or the hyperventilating. It was adorable. Thankfully she got past it quickly so they could get to work.

I brought Kirra to help James learn the part she usually sings but they cut the complex parts of the song so he was fine. Hopefully we can get it recorded and release the full version soon. James kept saying he loved the song so much and someone told me he said it was his new favorite.

The star-studded day didn’t end there. We got to hang out with tons of them but the one who personally called her on the phone had the biggest impact.

After stage rehearsal with James Arthur, Evie got a phone call from David Archuleta who is pretty much her favorite singer.

Evie Clair Reacts to Call from David Archuleta

They spok for a long time and after the freak out in front of the AGT staff, she found a quiet corner to really talk with David for a while. When she came back to find me I could tell she had been crying. I asked her about it and she said he was crying too. They were taking about David’s concert that Evie had attended with her dad last Christmas. It was her last daddy daughter date and she will never forget it and is grateful to David for making that time so memorable for her.

Evie then had to dash over for hair and makeup before the dress rehearsal. I thought she looked stunning last night. Our friend Michelle came to our hotel room that morning to do her lashes so she wouldn’t have mascara issues. Love this lady.

I watched the show back stage and their was a segment when they showed Amos. It was so touching and this beautiful Academy Award winning actress, Marlee Matlin, understood the situation despite being deaf, and came over to comfort me. I was a little star stuck by her when I saw out of the corner of my eye that she was crying with me and that someone I looked up to for the barriers she has broken knew what I was going through and mourned with me for that moment.

We spent some time taking pictures with the fan mob after the show then met up with our family and friends for an after party at Johnny Rockets. Aunt Jennie had to head back to the Phillipenes tonight so we were glad to get some time with her and many thanks to my friend Laura for bringing her to the airport.

As the show aired later in Phoenix, Channel 12 News crashed a watch party my sister Christy was having with her mutual group and they interviewed Evie’s cousin Sarah.

Before the night was over, Lucie, the AGT film director who came out to our home a few months ago, handed me a zip drive. She told me it was a message to Evelyn from her dad and to wait to watch it until we were home. What a gift! Not only the Zip drive but this whole day and this whole AGT adventure. It has been a bridge over troubled waters for us and I will always be grateful and marvel the magnitude of these blessings.

In other news, Kirra made her school soccer team! Yay! Can’t wait to get back home to be soccer mom.

AMERICA’S GOT TALENT — “Live Finale” — Pictured: Evie Clair — (Photo by: Trae Patton/NBC)

Thank you for lighting up social media last night with Evie Clair. I was reminded by a friend that Clair means light and in some languages it means famous. Both seem appropriate for sweet Evie Clair. She has been a light to me through the darkest days of my life. She is a leader who only watches her own lane unless there is an opportunity to lift someone else. She reminds me of my mom and grandmother who also have the name Clair.

Tonight Howie also spoke of light. After her performance he said…

“Before I tell you what I think of that, I just wanna say that our hearts and our souls go out to you, Evie. I know that your father passed this week, and I cannot believe the strength that I’m seeing in such a beautiful young girl, and this is a very dark time in your life, and we all go through dark times. What gets us through is hoping and praying for that light at the end of the tunnel and your voice, and your song, and your presence here is that light at the end of the tunnel, so thank you so much.”

Mel B: “Well first of all, you look absolutely stunningly gorgeous tonight. You really, really do, and I know your dad’s up there looking down and you must be so, so, so, so proud because what you just did was beautiful. It was so pure and so raw, just well done. Well done, seriously.”

Heidi: “Well I can’t even imagine what you and your family must be going through right now and I just wanna say that you’re one brave little young lady and one amazing singer, and we loved having you here and I wish you all the best of luck tonight.”

Simon: “Evie, I’m not gonna judge you. I am going to send you, or tell you how much I respect you, how much strength you have. This was a perfect tribute to your dad. Just the fact it was total silence means that everyone was listening to you. Your voice was beautiful, the song was beautiful, and I am very proud of you, Evie, for what you’ve just done and you’ve given yourself a shot for tonight, congratulations.”

Simon pulled Evie into his dressing room before the show to acknowledge a thank you card she had given him for the funeral flowers. She has found Simon to be such a kind person through this whole experience. Maybe being a father himself has softened him a little.

I’m not sure how the voting will turn out by morning but I feel she has already won no matter what happens. She loves the other contestants dearly and will be so happy no matter who takes home the prize. Her performance was the most beautiful I have ever seen or heard.

Evie had big support last night. Amos’s mom was there along with all of these crazy kids who flagged down Howie for a picture. He was running from the crowds until he realized they were Evie’s family and friends.

What a Wonderful World was Amos’s song and she sang it as a tribute to him. She said in an interview that he was out there on that stage with her and I believe he was.

Evie will be singing a special song tonight with a guest celebrity so tune in again for the 2 hour Wednesday finale.

My gratitute tonight is to my Heavenly Father and His Son who is the true Light of the World. Evie Clair is only reflecting that source. A mother couldn’t ask for more from her children.

Tomorrow is the big day and today was a day of preparation.

First we were taken to Universal Studios for live news interviews right next to the Harry Potter ride. My sister messsaged me from Texas to tell me Evelyn was on her local news.

We had all kinds of other preparations today including a meeting about what Evie would want to do for the Vegas show should she win. That would take place on a Friday and Saturday the first weekend of November. So the winner doesn’t necessarily need to be a “Vegas act” as some argue because there are really only 2 shows.

Evie doesn’t expect to win and is not a front runner but the timing of this in connection with Amos’s passing has been so peculiar to me.

Evie is making great friends on set and is loving her time here. She misses her siblings and is so excited that they will be here tomorrow.

Now for voting. There is an app you can download to vote 10 times. There is nbc.com that is also connected to Facebook and you can vote 10 times per email address there. You can also vote 10 times per phone with the number they provide for Evie Clair during the show.

Her song tomorrow is very special to her dad and I can hardly wait for you all to hear it and see her beautiful set.

Thank you all for encouraging me to keep writing the blog. I’ll probably end this one but start another one.

I miss Amos so much and think about him almost every minute. I find myself praying that I will dream about him. Last night I started a dream that he was in but quickly woke up. I felt like Christopher Reeves in the movie “Somewhere in Time” as I  tried desperately to fall back to sleep so that same dream would continue. 

This photo was from the day Evie first appeared on America’s Got Talent and Amos watched from a hotel near the hospital while recovering from a surgery.   I never would have believed at that moment how things would play out. I’m sure there is a purpose and until we understand all we can do is hang on and find joy in the journey.

The whole staff here at America’s Got Talent is now well versed in all things Evie Clair. They know she has special dress standards and that she needs Sunday mornings off for church.

The wardrobe lady was so excited to figure out that she could buy two of the same skirts for Evie when they are too short. That way she can layer them so they reach her knees. I told her that was very clever. She also had an open back dress picked out as one option and she told me not to worry because they would sew a back on just for her if that dress was selected by the executives.

This morning we attended the Hollywood Ward. We were warmly welcomed. Before the meeting, the first counselor told us they have had lots of celebrity visits over the years including Donny Osmond, David Archuleta and members of the cast of Porgy and Bess. It’s strange to have him compare Evie to such famous people.

Evie is a huge David Archuleta fan. In fact she was fangirling yesterday when Bishop Elwood called to tell us David Archuleta was trying to get ahold of her through him. David hasn’t contacted us yet but we are looking forward to it. At Christmas last year Evie and her dad went on a date to see a David Archuleta concert and it is one of her favorite memories with Amos.

After a visit with the bishopric counselor,  he asked Evelyn if she would mind being the impromptu youth speaker today. She was stunned but accepted and did a beautiful job. I think she would have felt more comfortable with a special musical number.  She spoke of her dad and her testimony of eternal families. Everyone was touched by her.

We then were taken back to the theater where we were able to see her set for Tuesday. I wish I could share pictures because I’ve never seen anything so beautiful. I kept wishing I could have some confirmation that her dad would be able to see her on that stage.

Grandma and Aunt Jennie took my kids to Stake Conference back at home today where they called a new stake Presidency. We will miss President Ray and I will always be grateful for him and his love for Amos. He spent many nights in the hospital with him.

I got to FaceTime my kids tonight. I feel that Porter might be struggling most with his dad’s passing. He is such a great son and is putting on a smile for now but I can see the pain in his eyes. He was very close to his dad who always took time to understand him and connect to his brilliant mind in a way I can’t.

The Hollywood ward had an especially good Sunday School class where I gained many good insights and parallels between our journey in life and the journey of he early pioneers.

Looking forward to a big week and grateful to all of you for your continued support. I will probably only keep up this blog up until the end of the week to report on how things turn out with Evie since Amos’s cancer journey seems to have come to an end. I will miss writing each day  I think it has been therapeutic for me.

 

 

Evie Clair has made the decision to return and compete in the finals of America’s Got Talent after being given the option from Simon to come back next season.

We are happy to be back in LA with the remaining cast, crew and staff who have become like a second family to us this past year.

I was sitting in the Dolby Theater this morning when Malcom, the script writer for America’s Got Talent, gave me this letter with his condolences.

Death is Nothing at All

By Henry Scott-Holland

“Death is nothing at all.
It does not count.
I have only slipped away into the next room.
Nothing has happened.

Everything remains exactly as it was.
I am I, and you are you,
and the old life that we lived so fondly together is untouched, unchanged.
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.

Call me by the old familiar name.
Speak of me in the easy way which you always used.
Put no difference into your tone.
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow.

Laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes that we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was.
Let it be spoken without an effort, without the ghost of a shadow upon it.

Life means all that it ever meant.
It is the same as it ever was.
There is absolute and unbroken continuity.
What is this death but a negligible accident?

Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am but waiting for you, for an interval,
somewhere very near,
just round the corner.

All is well.
Nothing is hurt; nothing is lost.
One brief moment and all will be as it was before.
How we shall laugh at the trouble of parting when we meet again!”

I loved these words and believe that he is near. I speak to him often and have felt him close.

Porter is at his first homecoming dance tonight and I’m missing him but happy that he will soon join me here in LA.

My cute little girls are being well cared for by grandparents and aunts and friends who love them dearly and I’m happy that they will also be able join us soon.

Some big AGT plans are in the works for both Tuesday and Wednesday of next week. You will not want to miss the finale so keep your schedules open and start planning parties to make sure your friends see it too.

My friend Jennifer Garbett took some really nice photos at the cemetery that I wanted to share. The one with Blakely sitting on Phoebe’s lap reminded me of the sweet words she shared at the family viewing.

In the sweetest voice she stood and told us that while we all believed dad would get through this and be ok, she believes he did get through it and he is ok. She said she also knows dad wants us to be happy. I love that smart girl and the ways she reminds me of Amos. Eventhough she is only 8, I hope she never forgets her time with him and the things he has taught her.

In addition to these funeral photos, Jen took family photos last year that my other friend Nicole had framed and sent to our home the day after Amos died. Along with those pictures, our home is also filled to the brim with beautiful flowers.

We had flowers come from family, friends and some other pretty cool people and organizations like the US Department of the Interior and the Arizona Interfaith Movement. We also got a massive arrangement from Simon Cowell and his wife then a separate one from Howie, Heidi, Mel B, Tyra and the AGT crew. We also got flowers from Luis Gonzalez (Gonzo) and the Diamondbacks just today.

I am in awe of the thoughtfulness of so many people.

There was another special moment at the viewing when a bunch of Amos’s wrestlers from Gilbert High School brought in a framed tribute to Amos with a wrestling uniform and presented it just before my dad said the family prayer and we closed the casket.

Evelyn has had a hard day. Halfway through two different interviews she broke down and ran away. She would do fine until they would ask specific questions about her dad and then she would go silent. I felt so bad for her. I was really proud of her for pulling herself together in both instances to continue the interviews saying her dad didn’t teach her to be a quitter.

One thing I have learned through this experience is that it has been a story of true love.

The last thing Amos said to me last week was “I love you!” He has said it to me a million times over the past 20 years but I know it without him ever saying it. He showed me by the way he treated me with respect and served me and sacrificed for our family. He even blew out his knee defending my honor once.

I have been missing him and struggling as I cleaned out our room today. I left his clothes hanging in the closet for now because and can’t quite seem to remove them yet.

A trusted friend sent me an email this morning that hit me hard…

“Let me start by saying how sorry we are to hear that Amos has passed away. He and your family have been an example of faith, perseverance, love, and humility as you have faced your challenges. I am not sure if you are aware, but Amos and I had a few interactions via email over the last 18 months or so. I have included them below. As you will see in those emails, I will always remember Amos for two specific things: 1) his example of service and 2) even more powerful, his love for his family.

I also wanted to share with you a dream that I had last night. I was sitting in the stands at a baseball game. My wife was to my right and Amos was to my left. He and I were engaged in small talk. “How are things?” “How is work?” “How is the family?” I shared with him that our family has really enjoyed watching Evelyn on America’s Got Talent. He responded by saying, “Thank you for praying for my family.” While still dreaming, I was suddenly struck with reality and I remembered that Amos had passed away. I asked, “Is this real?!” I got my wife’s attention and asked her, “Do you see Amos?” Before she could respond, Amos said, “Tell Hillary I love her.” With that, he was gone and I woke up.

I have no idea how I would respond if I were in your shoes and received an email like this. For this reason, I really debated even telling you about it. My dreams are generally random, confusing, and insignificant. I ask myself why would someone who is fairly removed from the situation have this type of interaction. I have known others who have passed away including my grandmother and my father-in-law and I have never had a dream that involved them. Ultimately, I decided to share this experience with you for two reasons. First, although I do not understand why I would have a dream with Amos, it was a very special experience for me and is something I will remember for the rest of my life. I share it with you so you know that even after his death, he has continued to positively impact others. Second, his final comment to me is one of the most vivid parts of the dream. It strengthens my testimony that temple marriages are forever and specifically shows me that his love for you is eternal.

Your family continues to be in our prayers. Our lives have been blessed by yours and we thank you for that. Our hope is that you will be comforted at this time and that the void you feel currently will be replaced with the joyous memories of Amos, the knowledge of God’s eternal plan for us, and the peace provided by the Comforter.”

Today I felt calm. We got to the church and everything was handled with care and precision by our church leaders and the funeral home. There was a massive turn out that filled the entire stake center to capacity. Amos is definitely loved.

My love for Amos grew today and I was filled with thoughts of the wonderful day we would be reunited.

I’ll share a little each day as photos, videos, recordings, memories and thoughts of the funeral proceedings come in.

Today I’ll share the life sketch delivered by Porter and my nephew Nick.

P: My dad was born December 11, 1975 in Malad Idaho, the 2nd son of Dean Abplanalp and Sandra Carol Sagers. He joined big brother Tom and 2 sisters, Tracy and Katie Jo.

N: He was happy baby, and nick-named fat boy by his dad. That name only stuck till he was about 3 because he just grew straight up. He had the same sized waist at 12 as he did as a baby.

P: He loved life, always had a big smile on his face and ran before he walked.

N: He was almost 3 when his family moved from Malad to Blackfoot. He and Tom thought their hearts would break in two when they had to leave their beloved babysitter, Trudy. But she made many trips to Blackfoot to continue to hold her spot in the family.

P: When baby sister, Abbe joined the family later that year, the family was complete.

N: On their little country road, Amos had a gang of friends. He would be gone in the morning until the sun went down occasionally coming in for lunch or cookies.

P: One day he was at the neighbor’s when his mom called him to come home. After calling him several times, his friend’s mom said “Amos, your mom wants you”. He said”Oh, I thought that was my imagination. Everyone has one, you know.”  And boy did he ever have one.

N: He had his own way of describing things. One day they were going to Grandpa and Grandma Sager’s house in Burley. At one point a bored little voice from the back seat asked, ” How many more go unders till we get there?  His parents looked at each other like “go unders”?  They finally realized he meant overpasses.

P: Even though he was a happy child, he liked to get his own way. He usually did, but when he didn’t, he could throw a pretty mean temper tantrum. He would hold his breath till he turned blue, scaring his mom half to death. Thank goodness, he outgrew those before he started school.

N: Amos loved to learn. He ate up anything new he heard and never forgot anything. His 4th grade teacher once told his mom she wished she could have a whole classroom of Amos’s. He never lost that need to learn everything he could.

P: Dad’d greatest knowledge came from the scriptures. He absolutely loved the gospel and its teachings of our Savior.  His favorite scripture is 3 Nephi: and 27:27. And know ye that “Ye shall be judges of this people. According to the judgment I shall give unto you which shall be just. Therefore, what manner of men ought ye to be.”  Verily I say unto you, even as I am.

N: When he was 9, his mom and dad divorced which was devastating to the little family. But when his mom married Evan Dance, everything was okay again. Amos had an instant bond with Evan. They truly loved each other. Just recently, Evan introduced himself as the step-dad and Amos got upset and told him to never introduce himself as the step-dad. He’s just dad. He has two #1 dads and he loves them both.

P: He not only got a new dad, but 3 new brothers: Russell, Jeremy and Dustin and 3 new sisters: Jennie, Amanda and Hilary as partners in crime. My dad grew up on a potato farm west of Blackfoot moving pipe, hunting rabbits and owning the desert. That’s where he gained a desire for an education. He was dang sure he did not want to move pipe for the rest of his life.

N: Amos loved sports. He grew up playing little league baseball and basketball. He once pitched a no-hitter in an All-Star Tournament and was named MVP. But his real love was wrestling. He started when he was 4 in free-style tournaments. His big brother, Tom was a wrestler, and he loved his brother, so he wanted to be a wrestler, too. He was always in the lightest weight. When he got to high school at Snake River, he had to eat to get to the lightest weight class. While his brothers were going to bed in down parkas, hats and down sleeping bags to lose weight, he was eating to gain. Didn’t make him too popular at home at the time.

P: My dad was on 2 state championship wrestling teams his Jr and Sr years. He finished 4th in the state his Sr. year. His love and passion for wrestling never diminished.

N: He graduated from Snake River High School in 1994. He then fulfilled his dream of being a missionary. Ever since he was a very small boy, he had the desire to go on a mission. Every single Fast Sunday Amos would go to the podium and declare his desire to go on a mission.

P: He also said Fast Sunday should be called slow Sunday because he was always so hungry by the time he was able to break his Fast. His favorite Primary song was “I Hope They Call Me on a Mission which they did. He served in the Canada Toronto Mission for two years, once again following in his big brother, Tom’s footsteps. He had served there 2 years before.

N: For the first 6 months of his mission he had the same mission president as Tom had his last 6 months. The family decided he needed to go to the same mission, because that was the only mission president in the church who would be able to pronounce his last name correctly.

P: As soon as he returned from his mission, he left to further his education at Brigham Young University where he quickly met the love his life and eternal companion, Hillary Clair Mann.

N: Amos met Hillary the summer just after his mission before he even started a class at BYU. He had a personal commitment that he was never going to spend money on someone else’s wife so 6 weeks after meeting Hillary, the first dime he spent on her was for an engagement ring.

P: They were married a few weeks later before the fall semester at BYU started. Mom and dad worked through college and it was almost 5 years until they were able to have children. They were so excited to find out mom was finally pregnant with me!

N: After Porter was born their lives got difficult as they tried to balance school and work and parenting. Amos did a psychology internship at the Utah State Prison then worked nights at a mental health facility. He went to school and slept in a hammock on the deck of our apartment with Porter during the days. Hillary worked days and cared for Porter at night.

P: Dad graduated from BYU just in time because babies only sleep 20 hours a day for the first little while. Our little family then moved from Utah to Arizona for graduate school at ASU.

N: Amos would do anything for his wife and was happy to select a school that was close to her family. He helped her start a music school in down town Mesa.

P: Dad loved mom but he hated to DJ karaoke nights at the music school. A thousand preteens asking him to put on the same songs over and over got old fast.

N: Thank goodness for his brother in law Ken who provided some real entertainment with Van Halen’s JUMP or Guns and Roses’ Welcome to the Jungle. Amos would only ever get up himself to sing one song;

P: What a Wonderful World – Louis Armstrong style!

N: Yes! (Sing: I see trees of green)

P: Soon my sister Evelyn was on the way. Mom taught high school music and dad held down the fort while he continued in graduate school.

N: Amos loved to cook and loved caring for his wife as she struggled with the morning sickness that came with each child. While they had Kirra, Ruth and Blakely, Amos taught high school to emotionally disabled students and also and coached wrestling.

P: My parents loved having summers off together and traveling to Idaho to visit grandma and grandpa Dance.

N: Amos had many callings in the church that he loved during this time. His favorite was Cub Master. He would dress up and become different characters for pack meetings. He was also the young men’s president and enjoyed preparing his priests for missions.

P: His main purpose in life an one he honored was to preside in our family as a husband and father. He made it a point to eat dinner with us and talk with his children about our lives and struggles. He held family home evening each Monday night and held family prayer and scripture study each night with great consistency.

N: After becoming highly qualified to teach many high school subjects, he felt a desire to go back to school himself and return to his original goal in the field of psychology.

P: As he accomplished that goal and became a licensed counselor, a job opportunity took his family to the prison town of Florence. He was shortly called as Bishop and 3 months later received a cancer diagnosis. He worked hard and served his church and family for a year and a half as his body declined and he was released as bishop just before passing away on September 7th, 2017.

N: This past year Amos’s fear wasn’t of dying but of not being able to provide for his family or see them accomplish their goals. He was given a tender mercy to stay long enough to baptize all of his children and witness a small piece of the great things they will do in this life.

P: My dad was understanding, wise, patient, funny, humble, kind and loved by all who knew him.

Just a beautiful, peaceful day. I had an appointment to pick our cemetery plot this morning. We will have a double plot so I can be buried with my sweetheart. I knew the right spot as soon as I saw it and I’m glad it was available.

I then had an opportunity I will never forget as long as I live. I was able to help dress my husband in his temple clothes. This was the last physical act of service I will be able to do for my husband in this life and my heart was full. The feelings were indescribable.

Tonight we had so many people come for the viewing at the funeral home. Flowers came from all over and they were beautiful. So many people came in from out of town to show support and I was blown away.

We are looking forward to seeing many of you at the funeral tomorrow.

America’s Got Talent was on an hour later tonight and we were thankful for that. We gathered with our extended family after the viewing to watch our friends perform. They were amazing and we are excited to meet up with them later this week.

We have several family members currently serving missions around the world. Mondays are the days we usually get letters from them. It was very difficult for them to hear of their uncle’s death when they are so far away and unable to return.

Our nephew, Justin, got permission to call me from France. His call was so comforting. He bore his testimony in French then English of the plan of salvation, the love of God and that death is not the end.

McKenna says, “Needless to say, I’m taking this one hard but I’m continually reminded about how this separation we are going to experience with Amos is so small in the eternal plan of God. But the growth and closeness we will gain with our Savior is immeasurable. I have so much respect for the Abplanalp family and their continued faith. Not only did they have enough faith for him to be spared; they also had enough faith for him not to be. This is the kind of faith that is required from the Saints of God.”

Carlie’s letter from Texas said in part, “Hillary and Abplanalp family I LOVE YOU! I know there is literally nothing I can say to make this easier but I know that the power of Christ and His atonement is beyond anything we encounter here.”

Sheridan sent these words… “When I entered the MTC I decided I wanted to improve my prayers. I made it a goal and was working really hard at it. When Elder Anderson visited us he promised that as I prayed for strength I would know that the Lord lives. I was also blessed at the MTC to know that God knows me and loves me. When I got to Vegas I just felt a lot of adversity and really doubtful of myself and lonely.

On Saturday night I read my emails and was told my uncle Amos passed away. The neighbors underneath us were blasting Rihanna and my talk was unwritten and my companion was in the other room writing in her journal. Even though I didn’t feel like it I got on my knees and prayed for strength for myself and my family. I know my Savior lives and I know Amos will live again. I know God knows me and my family, it was one of the most powerful prayers in my life. I’m not a very outwardly emotional person but I sobbed.”

I love these missionaries and their faith strengthens me and buoys me up in these dark days.

I was up in the night tracking hurricane Irma. Amos’s dad was hit but is ok. They lost a lemon tree and went without power but they were unharmed and we are so thankful.

My childhood friend, Adrian, sent me this beautiful picture of my family. I love it so much and it reflects the letters of our sweet missionaries and their testimonies of the Savior and eternal families.