Grief and Solace

We spent time at Bunker Funeral Home today making burial arrangements for Amos.

There will be a viewing at the funeral home Tuesday evening from 6 to 8pm at 33 N Centennial Way Mesa, AZ 85201. Flowers, etc. can be sent to that address.

The funeral services will be held 10am Wednesday, September 13th at 1521 E Bella Vista Rd San Tan Valley, AZ 85143 with a viewing at 9am.

Stages of grief have been apparent in all of us since Amos passed away yesterday. It comes in waves and moves between sadness, anxiety, grief, apathy, anger and love. We take turns comforting each other and breaking down when we are triggered by sentiments. We love him so much and are having difficulty defining our new world without him physically in it.

I found solace in the temple tonight with my sisters Phoebe and Sarah and my friend Rebecca. The blessings of the temple helped broaden my perspective and help me realize that we will have an eternity together. Right now is only a small moment in that big scene.

We ran into a teacher from the kids’ school at the temple who told us they had a moment of silence for Amos today and everyone was so emotional. We love our community and have been flooded with love and support from everywhere.

We need to apologize to Darin and Greg. There were two local radio spots we had planned. We couldn’t make them happen today but I’m sure things will get easier for us to talk about.

Death Has No Victory

Last night I stayed at the hospital with my sweetheart. He couldn’t communicate with me but I felt his spirit and rested well. The deep pain and anxiety of Tuesday were gone and I felt peace.

This morning I sat with Amos’s brother Tom in Amos’s hospital room. We were both struggling with understanding God’s will because we both believed Amos would be healed from this affliction. We studied and prayed and discussed. He never attempted to convince me of anything but just loved me and said that he knew all Amos wanted was for his wife to be happy.

After some pondering we came to the conclusion that faith is action. We wanted to show our trust in God and His will for Amos.

Tom received inspiration that our action should be to take Amos off life support and allow for God’s will to be done while allowing room for a miracle of healing or room for Amos to be released from a body that had been taken over by cancer.

He said the answers are usually simple but not always easy.

Grandma picked up the kids from school and brought them to the hospital. The nurses were so kind to prepare refreshments for our kids.

When our faithful children arrived we explained the situation and asked for their council in making this decision. They all agreed with tear filled eyes. We gave them each time alone with dad before turning off life-sustaining machines.







We watched him take his last breaths as he continued to breathe for about 15 minutes on his own. The children burst into tears but are now at home laughing at old home movies of daddy and remembering our great love for the most wonderful man any of us have ever known.

We find constant peace and joy in the knowledge that Jesus Christ paid the price of death so that it has no lasting victory. We will be with Amos again and we feel he can now be with us without the restrictions of his mortal body. Our faith in the Savior has grown today and our family has been strengthened forever.