Grief and Solace

We spent time at Bunker Funeral Home today making burial arrangements for Amos.

There will be a viewing at the funeral home Tuesday evening from 6 to 8pm at 33 N Centennial Way Mesa, AZ 85201. Flowers, etc. can be sent to that address.

The funeral services will be held 10am Wednesday, September 13th at 1521 E Bella Vista Rd San Tan Valley, AZ 85143 with a viewing at 9am.

Stages of grief have been apparent in all of us since Amos passed away yesterday. It comes in waves and moves between sadness, anxiety, grief, apathy, anger and love. We take turns comforting each other and breaking down when we are triggered by sentiments. We love him so much and are having difficulty defining our new world without him physically in it.

I found solace in the temple tonight with my sisters Phoebe and Sarah and my friend Rebecca. The blessings of the temple helped broaden my perspective and help me realize that we will have an eternity together. Right now is only a small moment in that big scene.

We ran into a teacher from the kids’ school at the temple who told us they had a moment of silence for Amos today and everyone was so emotional. We love our community and have been flooded with love and support from everywhere.

We need to apologize to Darin and Greg. There were two local radio spots we had planned. We couldn’t make them happen today but I’m sure things will get easier for us to talk about.

Evie Clair to Sing Anthem for Diamondbacks July 22


Amos made it through work today. He had an overwhelming show of love again from people who work at the prison. They are so excited for Evie Clair that it’s hard to contain!

Last night I asked Porter to pick up a few things for Amos on his way home from a double date. His friend Matthew couldn’t stop laughing when he saw the list of items we needed: Toddler food, orange juice and an enema.

Anyone who witnessed this might have wondered what two 16 year old boys were doing at Walmart late at night buying such items. They couldn’t find the enemas so I’m grateful Matthew wasn’t too embarrassed to ask. Enemas are difficult to use through the ostomy in Amos’s stomach, but he likes to have them on hand for emergencies. I hope the toddler food will be easy enough for his body to digest. It’s an idea worth trying and we’ll let you know how it goes. The orange juice is to mix with a new treatment he is trying that someone sent us.

Evie and Blakely and I traveled to Tucson this morning for a radio interview with 94.9 MixFM. As we came off the freeway into Tucson, Blakely saw an older man sitting on the side of the road with a sign. She met eyes with him and asked if I had any change to give him. I said I didn’t. Several minutes later she said, “mom, can we stop on the way back for (I thought she was going to say ice cream.) change for that man? I told her we could and that I was so touched by her tender heart.

The interview was awesome. After the interview, we spoke with the radio hosts: Greg Curtis and Mrs. Grant and Blakely told them about the man she saw and how we were going to get change for him next. They gathered a pile of coins from their desk that filled her little hands. When we got back to the freeway, the homeless man was gone. Blakely spent most of the two hour ride home looking for another homeless person. We didn’t find one until we got back to Florence and she was so happy to be able to help someone in need. I love children and their purity and their goodness and their love.

Here is a Facebook Live recording of the radio show if you missed it. Some of it is recorded sideways.

Tonight we were supposed to go out for dinner with our good friends Scott and Heidi before they move to Washington. Thankfully they texted me during the day to offer to bring dinner and come out to us instead. Amos was so thankful and said he probably wouldn’t have survived a night out. What a fun time. We will miss these amazing friends.

Update: Evie Clair will be singing the national anthem at the Arizona Diamondbacks baseball game on Saturday, July 22 so get tickets if you’d like to hear her sing. This will be her second time singing the anthem for our favorite team, the Diamondbacks. Here is a photo from her first.